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The Road to Damascus

 

Ripped from the files of the CIA!

 

Valerie "Val" Plum, America's Top Spy©, is back and this time she's got Nancy Pelosi with her!

 

Join the dynamic duo on a "secret" mission to bring Peace to the Middle Eastâ„¢.

 

Meet ace State Dept. hand Hatton Hand, Middle East gadfly Green Helmet Guy along with Asma and Dr. Bashar "Dr. Bashir" Assad, the Bill & Hillary Clinton of the Levant. Special guest appearance by the "Dean of White House reporters," Helen Thomas.

 

Can Val and the First Female Speaker of the United States House of Representatives® thwart the unholy machinations of the evil Dick Cheney and his puppet, the idiot-savant Bush, while overcoming the bad taste left by John Kerry? 

 

This needs a woman's touch!

 

Now it can be told (excepting whatever the CIA censors remove)! It's Lucy & Ethel meet a Hope & Crosby road picture. With Hatton Hand starring as Dorothy Lamour!

 

"The Road to Damascus" is the second installment of Valerie Plum's much anticipated memoirs.

"The Road to Damascus" can be found at eBook retailers everywhere. See our Books page for links to sellers and our Samples page for a sample.

The Speaker is reaching out to us to accompany her on this very important mission to undermine the White House... er... I mean reach out to Syria... No need for the list of the usual Bozos, you're going.

Chapeaux, Assistant Chief Deputy Director, CIA

 

Dr. Bashir! It's me, Nancy Pelosi! From San Francisco! The first female Speaker of the House of Representatives! Over here! I wore my Donna Karan hijab just for you!

Nancy Pelosi

 

I have a family. All these children will want to go to nice schools. You'll have to get them into Harvard or wherever they want to go. And I have expenses. You can't believe how much it costs to run a dictatorship and personality cult. If those useless Saudi princes can live like kings, why not my children?

Dr. Bashar Assad

 

It's hard to believe she is the Speaker of the United States House of Representatives.

Hatton Hand, U.S. State Department

Seven Days in September

 

Our first book was "Seven Days in September," the story of the fateful night of Sept. 11, 2012. The author, Valerie Plum, CIA liaison to the White House, was there during the whole episode and the following six days. She chronicles the events as they happen and the calls made by important decisionmakers such as President Barack Obama and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. Val, known as "America's Top Spy," was on-site and she'll bring the reader with her on that eventful night.

 

Only now can the story be told: the inside dope at the White House, the scramble at the State Dept., the meetings to fix the blame and, finally, the tearful funeral. All because of a video - or was it?  

 

"Seven Days in September" is the first installment of her much anticipated forthcoming memoirs.

"Seven Days in September" can be found at eBook retailers everywhere. See our Books page.

Oh, man, I really hope this isn't going to mess up my plans for Vegas. Par-tay in Sin Ci-tay!

President Barack Obama, Sept. 11, 2012

 

Hello, Washington, is anybody there?

CIA Security Personnel in Benghazi, Sept. 11, 2012

 

If anyone makes a 3 a.m. phone call joke about this, they'll regret it. The name Vince Foster should always be on your mind.

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, Sept. 11, 2012

 

Leon, those guys are goners.

President Barack Obama, later that night, Sept. 11, 2012

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